Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) is a type of psychotherapy developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, PhD. This style of therapy allows for an in-depth healing process through approaching these parts with curiosity, compassion, and understanding to connect with your Self.
At the core of IFS is the idea of parts inside who have various goals and agendas for us. A common experience might be feeling torn between a decision like going to dinner with friends versus eating take-out while binging Netflix on the couch alone. This internal polarization is between two parts of you who have different agendas and ways of helping, which is always a good intention. All parts are good in nature because they have a positive intention for the person, even if its actions are counterproductive or cause dysfunction.
The parts of IFS therapy
In IFS, there are two main types of parts, protectors and exiles. These parts are based on what they do in your system and how they function for you in the world.
Exiles have experienced past trauma or other adverse experiences typically linked to childhood. These parts are often hidden away and work to keep similar events from happening again. Most of the time, they are surrounded by other guarded parts that are referred to as protectors.
Protectors—which include two types: managers and firefighters—are parts that work to shield from the pain and shame of exiles.
- Managers are the ones that keep us going by being proactive. They may try to control our environment and avoid getting hurt. For example, you may have a perfectionistic manager who attempts to control various situations but as a result, brings on more anxiety and depression when the control attempts fail.
- Firefighters are reactive and attempt to extinguish the pain in any way possible. These parts often look for escape from pain or discomfort through impulsive actions like addictive behaviors, endless scrolling on social media, heavy drinking, extreme anger. Sometimes firefighters can go to extremes in their role since their focus is to put out the flame of pain at whatever way possible resulting in harmful actions.
Self
Another distinction in IFS is Self, a peaceful presence inside that is separate from polarized parts and learned behaviors. Self is characterized by the 8C’s (Calm, Curiosity, Clarity, Compassion, Courage, Confidence, Creativity, and Connectedness). The steady stream of you underneath your thoughts and emotions that can notice what’s happening inside without being swept away by it. This is the real you, the core of who you are, the natural leader of your internal system.
Just as the sun is always shining even on a cloudy day, Self is always there, even when parts block how brightly it shines. A main treatment goal of IFS therapy is fostering connection with Self and parts. When our parts connect with the true you, they often lower defenses and reactivity because they are building trust and borrowing Self-energy.
Example of IFS in Action
Say you experience anger and tend to shut down when receiving criticism. On the surface, it might even come out as withdrawing from a conversation or even lashing out toward others.
In traditional therapeutic approaches, you might learn ways to cognitively process this behavior by identifying the thoughts and beliefs in order to challenge this and override through control.
In IFS, instead of trying to suppress or control that anger, we get curious about it. The therapist might say, “Can you turn toward that angry part and notice what it’s trying to do for you?”
Through this process, you might learn about how this protective part is working to ensure you don’t feel disregarded or overlooked, like you did as a child, and how this is a positive intention. When we see the positive intention of a part, it often lowers the intensity enough to learn about the pain that it’s trying to prevent which then lowers reactivity outside of the session.
With enough time connecting to the anger with compassion and curiosity (from Self) the part can then allow connection with the exile that it’s protecting. Then allowing to release the burden of shame that is being held onto. Allowing for freedom for the whole system including the anger who’s been protecting the hurt exiled part.
Why it works
IFS therapy works for several reasons and touches on principles of meditation and traditional psychotherapy approaches. Throughout working with parts of yourself, you gain an objective and nonjudgemental stance on thoughts and emotions much like the goal of mindfulness and meditation. As you connect with parts with Self-energy, you are practicing mindful awareness and going further to care for the parts that feel this.
Many psychotherapy approaches focus on symptom relief by restructuring resulting in judging a parts action(s) as bad. Instead, IFS focuses on why the symptom arose in the first place and healing the parts at their root. IFS helps you relate differently to your inner experience so your system can heal and reorganize naturally.
If you are curious about IFS, Knox Therapy Center offers IFS-informed therapy in Knoxville and via telehealth. Fill out an inquiry form here.
Resources
The IFS Institute